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mbaker
11-17-2004, 12:46 PM
This artical may seem like it's from 'The Onion', but it's very telling of the Hollywood mentality, and too good to pass up.


http://www.datelinehollywood.com/showarticle.php?articleID=340

STUDIOS SUE PIXAR, DEMAND BAD MOVIE
"Stop making the rest of us look bad," demand Hollywood executives
Hollywood — The eight major Hollywood studios have filed suit against CGI animation company Pixar for its consistent record of quality movies. The complaint alleges that with its sixth consecutive profitable and critically acclaimed film in “The Incredibles,” Pixar is overturning a decades-long public relations campaign waged by Hollywood studios to convince the public that it’s impossible to consistently make high quality films. “If Pixar doesn’t get with the program, we’re going to have to fundamentally change the way we do business,” groused Paramount chairwoman Sherry Lansing, whose studio hasn’t produced a hit film in several years. “I repeat my recommendation to Steve Jobs that he pay John Travolta and Halle Berry $20 million each to provide voices for an effects-laden remake of ‘The Fox and the Hound.’”
Plaintiffs in the suit are Paramount, Universal, MGM, Fox, Disney, Warner Bros., Dreamworks, and Sony Pictures. All eight studios have worked together since 1980 in a sophisticated PR effort to make all Americans believe that it’s inevitable most films will be poor to mediocre. The campaign has included payoffs to critics, training for film school professors, and talking points distributed to corporate spokespeople. Because of the successful campaign, executives have successfully built a system in which they spend tens of millions of dollars each year on development and end up producing as many critically and commercially successful films as a monkey throwing darts at a board would, according to scientific studies.
Asked for comment, a Pixar spokesperson said he believes the suit was motivated by studio executives’ indignation that Pixar and Apple CEO Steve Jobs refused to send them each a free iPod Photo.
According to the studios’ talking points, it’s impossible to consistently make more than 50% of films be high quality, with an average hit to miss ratio of 1:2. But with its six profitable and acclaimed films, Pixar is beginning to make many Americans questions why it actually seems possible to consistently make successful films.
“Those guys are ruining it for everybody,” said Warner Bros. president Alan Horn. “We can’t possibly be expected to stay in business when we’re up against a studio that doesn’t have dozens of unqualified young executives with little or no background or interest in film meddling in the creative process of all their movies.”
“It just goes to show what I’ve always said,” added Universal Chairwoman Stacy Snider. “It should be illegal for companies outside of Los Angeles to produce motion pictures.”
The complaint asks that a court award the eight studios $1 billion in damages or compel Pixar to hire 118 unqualified development executives, option the rights to 38 scripts and books it has no intention of turning into films, and immediately greenlight sequels to “Toy Story” and “Finding Nemo” with $100 million-plus budgets and hire directors whose only experience is in music videos to oversee them.

AngryBeavers
11-17-2004, 12:55 PM
Jackie Chiles would make a great lawyer for Pixar… NOT!
Maybe the other studios.

J. B. Warner
11-17-2004, 01:48 PM
Is this for real?

Daffysleftfoot
11-17-2004, 02:23 PM
It's not "too true to be funny" rather "it's SOOOOO true it's hilarious". :D

To whomever penned that, I say BRAVO!! :cool:

bjimba
11-17-2004, 03:54 PM
Here's a real news story that suggests Disney will be working hard to kill off that Pixar magic -- they intend to make "Toy Story 3" without Pixar's involvement:

http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/16/film.toy.story/index.html

J. B. Warner
11-17-2004, 04:03 PM
Here's a real news story that suggests Disney will be working hard to kill off that Pixar magic -- they intend to make "Toy Story 3" without Pixar's involvement:

http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/16/film.toy.story/index.html
Shoot me.

Daffysleftfoot
11-17-2004, 09:41 PM
Hey, as long as WE get the word out that Toy Story 3 is NOT a Pixar production, their reputation should be fine. (And Disney's/Eisner's rep will be unchanged. :p )

AngryBeavers
11-17-2004, 11:13 PM
Wait... doesn't John Lesseter own the Toy Story characters?

RetroMan
11-17-2004, 11:37 PM
Haah! That was a really good joke Hollywood, veery funny! Suing Pixar because it makes crippling film companies look bad- gimme a break! When will this monkey tribe called film industry realize that good movies are made for the sake of the craft and not to rip-off the shiftless masses? To Pixar I say: keep up the good work! (and why not open a 2D division?)

mbaker
11-18-2004, 03:42 PM
Aw, boo-hoo-hoo! Poor Hollywood can't make good movies like they use to, and with Pixar setting the standard, do they learn from their success. NO! They continue to produce assembly line crap starring no talent, ego driven hacks directed by music video philistines! And they wonder why none of their movies score big at the box office anymore. Hollywood has become so formulasitc that you can teach it in Alegbra class. For example:

1. Buddy Movie Plot: One white guy + one black guy are teamed together. They scew up and almost get kicked off the force. In the last 10 mintues, they finally track down the bad guy at an abandoned warehouse/refinery/factory. The black guy is either Eddie Murphey, Martin Lawrence*, Chris Tucker, Chris Rock.
* Martin Lawrence = poor's man Eddie Murphy. I swear that the "Buddy Movie" is part of some socalist plot, since 20% of the movies that come on in a given year use the above model.

2. Adam Sandler: Not really a movie plot, but this guy plays the same role in EVERY frekin movie. I mean, at least Jim Carrey has done a few different roles.

3. Dissaster Movies: I also hate how studios will copy each other's idea. Like two studios will release a natural disaster movie months apart from each other. Coinencidence, I think not? And everyone wonders why I usually stick to watching Anime.

4. Hilary Duff: She's the Skipper doll for a new generation Just as empty as Barbie, only much more annoying. Hillary Duff is the all perpous teeny bopper hack. She sings, she dances, she 'acts'. Isn't she perfect? Well, if she could actually act, that would be something, but sadly, she can't. Hillary Duff strikes me as that girl in the high school play that's just so sweet, so well meaning, and so adorable that no one has the balls to tell her just how bad she sucks. She only limits herself to insubstantial teen fluff, and dosen't take a chance with something different because that would require 'talent'. Something that Hilary, and those like her, seriously lack! She must be destroyed!

If Hollywood didn't make so much cinematic garbage, and just concentrate on making quality films, i probably would go to my local theater more often.

cbrubaker
11-22-2004, 07:58 AM
...yeah...so...jealousy goes to going this far, huh?

Seriously, I dislike CGI movies EXCEPT Pixar's. I like it because of good story and I also like how they use the CGI use. Pixar is using CGI NOT because to make money, it's because it's THEIR style! Other studios somehow thinks that their use of CGI makes money, but it's because of their GOOD STORY. CGI is only their style, like how Aardman Animation's animation style is stop-motion.

Pixar is good because they hire very talented people who knows the REAL way to run animation business and comedy. Face it, Hollywood, you're only making a fool out of yourself.

mbaker
11-23-2004, 11:30 AM
Hollywood in general, and Disney in particular is having an identity crisis as far as animation goes. They want to be just like Pixar, but have forgotten who they really were in the first place. Listen, Disney. You need to start being Disney again. Not Pixar, or Nickelodeon. Just do what you do best. 2D animation with great stories. Oh, and Warner Bros, that goes for you, too! Bring your animation departments (be they theatrical, or television) back to what originally made them great. Is that so hard to do? People are trying way to hard to be something they're not these days. Is being yourself such a crime?